Quest for toilets

Finding facilities and deciding upon the quickest route to them is foremost on many MS sufferers I have communicated with. Once again we are dealing with receptors that do not function at their peak. In this case the receptors are those located in the bladder, which seems to recognize that the bladder is filling up and send a signal that emptying it is required. The information that you are not given is how full it is and thus how much time you have to find the appropriate facilities.

So when you do get the signal to relieve yourself, you suddenly find yourself in a panic because other receptors are telling you that the nearest lavatory is still too far away. The specialists will ask you how the "water works" are, so they are aware that this is a common MS problem and is not gender specific. In fact, at some point you will be required to undergo the dignity of a "water works examination" which sounds more tragic than it really is. At first they may scan you (with the same scanner and aqueous cream used to scan a developing foetus in a womb) for a baseline measurement. You then drink ... drink and then drink some more. Then you wait. When they feel that your bladder has filled enough, which incidentally is about 30 minutes after the point where you are convinced that the bladder shall burst, they pull you in for another scan. During this scan they press down upon your filled bladder with the scanner, further upsetting the balance between maintaining dignity and relieving oneself in public. When they have finished, the invite you to relieve yourself at facilities that by no stretch of the imagination are near enough to reach without spillage.

Somehow you do manage, either by tying the hose into a knot or mincing your way along the length of the hospital. Neither is particularly useful. Relief is instantaneous and prolonged, but the whole drama is not over yet. Afterwards you get dragged in for a final scan. Why do they do this? It is all designed to determine whether you are able to empty your bladder entirely. Why is this important? Because most MS sufferers need to visit the lavatory more often than most non-sufferers, and the doctors think this has to do with an inability to properly empty the bladder. I am not convinced about this.

But the indignity of the "water works examination" was an experience I do not care to repeat.